About 10 years ago, there was a liberating change in men’s fashion. Untucked shirts became a fashion statement.
Previous to that, if a man wore his shirttail untucked, he was considered slovenly, possibly homeless, uncultured, or a painful burden on society.
But around 2011, the nomenclature “untucked” was put on some men’s fashions and the price of the trendy shirt went up 10 bucks for the exact same shirt that had previously been tucked. Essentially, we men were paying more to simply not tuck.
I cannot tell you the last time I tucked a shirt into my pants. It might have been during the Eisenhour administration. Things were pretty conservative back then, and if you left your shirt untucked you were probably a communist.
Then along came John F. Kennedy, a younger less conservative president, who was seen in shirttails on the beach in Hyannis Port, and I decided, no more tucking for me. And I haven’t tucked ever since.
A couple of days ago, the wife bought me a shirt. It was a very sweet gesture.
“Thank you, Honey. This is very nice, but I don’t see ‘untucked’ anywhere on the label,” I said.
“It’s more of a dress shirt, Dear, for you to wear tucked into nice dress pants. With a coordinating belt.”
Getting upset I said, “Are you calling me a communist just because I refuse to tuck my shirt in? Are you saying I’m a burden on society?”
“What are you talking about?” the wife said.
“You think that because I don’t tuck, that I’m some kind of a low-life that you have to drag out of the gutter with a tucked-in dress shirt?”
Sensing irrational behavior, the wife said, “You know what? I don’t care how you wear the shirt, tucked or untucked. It makes no difference to me.”
“So, what you’re saying, is that you don’t give a tuck how I wear the shirt. Is that what you’re saying?”
“That is exactly what I am saying. I don’t think you could tuck that shirt in over your bulbous mid-section if you tried. One cough or burp and your shirttail would be hanging out all over the place anyway.”
It’s true. Being slightly round presents a problem for men who need to tuck. To keep their shirttails in, they need to wear their pants up high, about six inches above their navels. While this look is not particularly attractive, at least no one would think you’re a communist.
“Honey,” I said to the wife. “I did not mean to sound ungrateful. I do appreciate the shirt, but I will be wearing it untucked.”
“I understand, Dear. Untucked is just your style.” She said. “I will love you however you tuck your shirt. …”
Raul Ascunce is a freelance columnist for the Sentinel-Tribune. He may be contacted at [email protected].
